Jen Pinkston and Jessie Pepper chat about everything from daytime talk shows to daunting house renovations.
In this episode you’ll hear about:
- Decision making. Basing big choices on a scale of priorities and the concept of a fair partnership. These moments allow you to honor the things that are most important to your spouse, and doing so can be a great way to encourage the good of the unit.
- Moving and settling and temporary living spaces. Making a joint decision to live somewhere that you love is incredibly unifying. Things like “quality of life” and family time CAN be the new status symbol. We are both big fans of designing your life around however YOU define success, because this creates a ton of joy!
- TV Set Love Story. Jen and Aaron met on the set of The Ellen Degeneres Show! Their love thrived in the LA sun, but now the Pinkstons are putting down roots in Austin, Texas.
- Being yourself. Acknowledging the challenge of being true to who you are within the new unit you’ve created together. Strength in this area will allow you to serve and love your partner from a much more stable place.
- Communicating your preferences. It’s all about delivering them in a way that is efficient and respectful. Both for the sake of getting your way but also because it’s important to be gentle with your partner. Timing of these moments can be used to your advantage, and so can bringing a mediator or even an entire community into your relationship.
- Connecting during busy seasons. This gets easier with time. (Praise the Lord.) One great way to get through it is recognizing that it will eventually come to an end, and then knowing you’ll be able to reconnect when the swell has passed. Cooking dinner together can be a great way to transition from individual days to evenings as a family.
- Social media struggles. Being in the same room and on social media at the same time can be a tricky thing to manage well. Jen suggests checking in with your partner sporadically, and getting involved in a playful way to avoid seeming naggy or upset.
- Avoiding conflict. No matter how hard you try, it’s nearly impossible to find someone who has never hurt their partner’s feelings. Jen convinces me that the Pinkstons come very close to this qualification, but then admits that recently forgetting to compliment Aaron’s organizational skills might have accidentally ruined their streak.
- Words of affirmation. Even a simple sentence of encouragement can go a long way, but Jen reminds me of a recent realization I had: it’s not enough to shower your partner with loving words, because we often forget about the times that we criticize them (without meaning to) and that ultimately drains their love-tank.
- Making friends in a new city. Recognizing your life-stage and asking yourself, “where could our people be hanging out?” Flip through your mental rolodex of friends who are coupled up, and try to think of people with partners who might pair well with your own.
According to Jen, “Great Love is when both of us feel like we are being the most true version of ourself but also honoring the most true version of the other person... The place where those two things intersect is when we’re both at our best together.”
Find out more about Jen on her website The Effortless Chic, and follow along with her life as a happy wife on instagram!